The Kindness of Strangers

Life was going well for *Mike and *Sherry. They had good jobs with benefits, enjoyed spending time with Mike’s young daughter as much as they could, and had made their rental house a home. But one

day…everything changed.

After a fire destroyed their home and all their belongings, Mike and Sherry began the painful and emotional process of determining their next steps. Thankfully, they were insured, but as is often the case, they encountered a lot of red tape and a prolonged period of time to sort through all the details. In the meantime, deposits were being requested for utilities and a new place to live; in addition to needing money for household items, furniture, and clothing. Mike and Sherry knew financial help would come; the question was when and how much.

Having never faced such dire financial circumstances, the couple found it difficult to reach out for help. But finally, in desperation, Mike and Sherry came to Catholic Charities and shared their story through many tears. Hugs were given – as was financial assistance to help with monthly bills – and the couple was reassured they are not in this battle alone and we would do whatever we could to help them through the next few difficult months.

Catholic Charities was able to assist with a utility bill, help feed them through the Table of Blessings, share produce from gracious local growers, and connect them with a generous donor with furniture to share.

Mike and Sherry have since received their insurance settlement and came to our office with a generous donation to “pay back” what was given to them. While this is always welcomed and appreciated, we aren’t looking to be “paid back” and are confident that Mike and Sherry simply want to “pay it forward” so Catholic Charities can continue to help someone else in a similar crisis.

Mike shared with us, “I never realized that strangers could really care about us until we came to your door.” And that is the most important work we do throughout the year – create hope.

*Not real names

Being Religious Doesn’t Always Mean Being Right

We all have our comfort zone. The question is: do we ever get out of it? If we wish to follow the example of Jesus, we must be prepared to have encounters with people that would typically have us running the other direction. Take a peek into this conversation between Jesus and the respected religious leaders of his day found in Matthew 9:9-13:

As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the customs post. He said to him, "Follow me." And he got up and followed him.

While he was at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners came and sat with Jesus and his disciples.

 

The Pharisees saw this and said to his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?"

He heard this and said, "Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do. Go and learn the meaning of the words, 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' I did not come to call the righteous but sinners."

Did you notice these well-respected religious leaders have an air of spiritual superiority about them? Rather than desiring to help the weak, vulnerable, poor, and blatant ‘sinners’, they consider it offensive for Jesus to give them the time of day. These men were religious, but they were totally wrong in how they related to God and others. They needed a change of heart.

In his New York Times best-seller, Love Does: Discovering a Secretly Incredible Life in an Ordinary World, author Bob Goff writes, “Jesus spent most of his life with people we spend most of ours trying to avoid.”

Could it be true? Do you spend most of your time where you feel most comfortable – avoiding people and places because of a sense of spiritual snobbery? Do you need a change of heart toward God and others? If so, it’s never too late to “get in the game” of loving others the way Jesus loves. Selflessly. Fearlessly. Undeniably.

Let’s love like Jesus today. It’s because of his love for us that we have the privilege to do the same.

Helping Families Recover from Trauma

Trauma comes in many forms: domestic violence, poverty, child abuse and neglect, homelessness. Whatever the form, the impact on family functioning can be ongoing and the emotional, social, and physical health of family members is often seriously damaged; sometimes bridging generations. Helping families recover from trauma and build resilience to ongoing trauma such as poverty is currently seen as crucial to providing mental health services that adequately address the needs of both the children and adults.

Catholic Charities has explored many innovative programs to help families that have experienced significant levels of trauma. One of the newest of these programs to be utilized by Catholic Charities in Bloomington’s Counseling and Psychological Services is called "Strengthening Families Coping Resources" (SFCR). SFCR is a trauma-focused, multi-family, skill-building intervention. SFCR is designed for families living in traumatic contexts with the goal of reducing the symptoms of posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and other trauma-related disorders in children and adult caregivers. Since most families living in traumatic contexts contend with ongoing stressors and threats, SFCR is also designed to increase coping resources in children, adult caregivers, and in the family system to prevent relapse and re-exposure. Specifically, SFCR builds the coping resources necessary to help families boost their sense of safety, function with stability, regulate their emotions and behaviors, and improve communication about and understanding of the traumas they have experienced. We may think of trauma as something "big," like being the victim of or witnessing violence, but not understand how something like the ongoing daily stress of poverty is also a major source of trauma. SFCR is designed to help families recognize the more subtle forms of trauma and how to develop skills and family relationships that help build resiliency and reduce the traumatic impact resulting from ongoing environmental stress.

Catholic Charities is here to provide help and create hope for all. If you would like more information about our counseling services, please call (812) 332-1262 or visit CatholicCharitiesBtown.org.

Abused. Afraid. Alone.

Knowing she should leave her abusive husband, but lacking the courage and self-confidence to do so, Sharla* stayed. Until…she found out he was sexually abusing their daughter, as well.

With her now ex-husband in prison, Sharla moved away from the area and homeschools her young daughter.

She has just a small amount of disability income to live on and is usually able to pay all her bills. But every few months, she comes to Catholic Charities in need of assistance.

Providing help. Creating hope.

A big part of the assistance for Sharla is our Budget Basics classes in Tell City – a curriculum designed specifically for Catholic Charities with classes taught by experts in finance and other related fields. In addition to necessary budget skills, we teach the connection between personal decisions resulting in either good or bad consequences. If an enrolled individual does not complete the class or required homework, emergency assistance funds from Catholic Charities will not be available to them for a period of three years.

Sharla is proceeding through the classes wonderfully and has already found ways to cut expenses. She was also encouraged to use her talents at making crafts to bring in a little more income, so she eagerly contacted local craft stores and will have a table at craft fairs this fall to sell her items.

Sharla is on the road to a more self-sufficient life – and her little girl is thriving.

Often, through no fault of their own, our neighbors are unable to make ends meet.

Together, we are making a difference.

For more information about Catholic Charities, please visit us online.

*Not her real name.

"I'm Hungry"

It’s a common phrase, isn’t it? You will likely hear a co-worker, friend, or child express it during the course of a week; or even proclaim it yourself during a busy day. Yet for most of us, “I’m hungry” means we walk to the refrigerator, or break room, or pull up at the nearest drive-thru and satisfy our need. Not so for far too many in our communities.

According to Feeding America, 1 in 6 Americans struggles with hunger. Read that again. Let it sink in.

1 in 6.

This is not your average “I’m hungry” situation. This represents children going to bed with growling tummies. Parents struggling to pay utilities while keeping food on the table – but unable to do both.

For those of us who can meet our hunger needs and cravings at a moment’s notice, we are in the perfect position to extend the love of Christ to those who simply cannot.

Did you know September is Hunger Action month? What a great time to put yourself in someone else's shoes by taking the Hunger Challenge. Join Catholic Charities at the United Way Hunger Challenge Facebook page. During the week of September 15-21, see if you can you eat on just $4.52 a day or $31.70 for one week.

Then contact your local Catholic Charities to see how YOU can help alleviate “I’m hungry” all year long.

A New Identity

We each have multiple ways that we identify who we are in life. But for the children in our community who are abandoned, neglected, or abused, perhaps their only way of identifying themselves is…

                                                  Helpless.      Desperate.     Hopeless.

At only 8 years old, Brandon was taken into protective custody after protecting his mother during a domestic dispute. Both of Brandon’s parents had a long history of substance abuse and his father had abandoned him at birth.

Over the next six years, Brandon went through multiple placements in treatment facilities, foster homes, a youth shelter, and the juvenile detention center – all while his mother was serving a lengthy prison sentence. Brandon was allowed to have contact with his mother during this time, and he remained hopeful that they would be reunited upon her release. When that day finally came, his mother fell back into a life of drugs and domestic violence, unable to reconnect with her son.

Then, St. Elizabeth Catholic Charities’ CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) volunteer was appointed to Brandon’s case. The two quickly established a rapport and for the first time in Brandon’s life, a sense of trust was developed. Due to the tenacity of his CASA volunteer, Brandon successfully remained a Child in Need of Services (CHINS) through the court system; resulting in a voluntary termination of parental rights and enabling the pursuit of adoption.

Brandon’s CASA spends countless hours with him – and has observed Brandon make great strides towards normalcy, including being an active and valued member of a youth football team and attending church each Sunday, where he saves a seat for the CASA who attends with him. Ever vigilant in her dedication to Brandon’s success, when asked if she will remain in his life, her reply to Brandon is swift and from the heart, “I hope to dance at your wedding someday.”

Without the love and support of this CASA volunteer, Brandon would not be who he is today…

Successful.      Confident.       Hopeful.

Together we can reach out to those in desperate need… offering them a new identity.

From Fear to Confidence

As a 4th grader at an Indianapolis parochial school, "Paul" should have been enjoying just being a kid. Sadly, his life was ruled by an anxiety disorder and he coped by avoiding any situation that made him feel anxious. Afraid of almost everything, Paul was missing out on activities he used to enjoy and rarely tried anything new.

One of Paul's classmates also struggled with anxiety and had made significant progress with the help of a social worker from the Catholic Charities School Social Work Program in Indianapolis during the previous school year. The classmate's mother suggested to Paul's parents that this program might also be able to help their son, and they were eager to give it a try.   

The social worker came alongside Paul throughout the whole first semester - helping him understand anxiety and how his mind and body respond to stressors. They made a "worry workbook" together, listing all of Paul's worries from the smallest to the biggest. Then they developed positive ways for Paul to respond to those worries and started adding those coping skills to his "tool box." Paul was learning how to manage his stress so that he felt calm and in control.

The social worker also spent time with Paul's parents, helping them develop communication skills to effectively help their son. By God's grace and the help of Catholic Charities School Social Work Program, Paul has successfully tackled several of the worries on his list and now responds with healthy coping skills. Paul has developed an increased level of confidence in his abilities and is doing better academically, as well as socially.

For more information about this program, please call 317-236-1523.